For many, the first time is an emotionally charged moment - full of expectations, uncertainties and often myths. The hymen in particular is at the center of many misunderstandings. Is it really a "skin" that tears during first sex? Does bleeding mean that someone hasn't had sex before? And what if nothing happens? In this article, we explain what the hymen really is, what its function is and why it should not be used as a measure of virginity.

The hymen is one of the most misunderstood parts of the body. Many myths surround this thin, elastic fold of tissue at the entrance to the vagina. However, contrary to popular belief, the hymen is not a "skin" that tears or bursts the first time. There are different shapes and forms, and in some people it is barely present from birth.

Another misconception: not every person with a vagina bleeds the first time. This is completely normal! The hymen can develop and stretch differently through sport, tampons or simply due to the natural build of the body. It is therefore not "proof" of sexual inexperience or virginity.

The hymen has no medically necessary function, which is why many people wonder why it exists at all. Scientists suspect that it has an evolutionary protective function for the body. Some possible theories are:

• Protection from infection: At a young age, the hymen may have helped to reduce bacteria entering the vagina.

• Natural development process: Like many other parts of the body, it is a structure that can regress or change as you grow.

• No specific function: Some researchers believe that the hymen is simply an anatomical feature with no specific function.

Whether it plays a role or not is ultimately irrelevant - the important thing is that it is not a "barrier" that should be equated with virginity.

The hymen is a stretchy, elastic membrane that wraps around the entrance to the vagina in a ring or crescent shape. There are different shapes:

• Crescent-shaped: The most common variant, which has a natural opening.

• Circular with a small opening: Here the hymen is round with a smaller opening that stretches over time.

• Notched or jagged: Sometimes it has natural indentations that make it particularly elastic.

• Septated hymen: Here there is a thin bridge of skin in the middle, which in rare cases can make penetration more difficult.

• Completely closed: An extremely rare variant that may require medical intervention.

Each of these forms is completely normal - and each reacts differently to touch and movement.

The myth that the hymen tears is long outdated. In fact, the tissue is usually elastic and can stretch without "bursting". Many people don't feel anything at all. If it does tear slightly, it is usually not painful and heals quickly.

If you feel pain the first time, this is often due to tension or a lack of moisture - not the hymen itself. Make sure you go slowly, get sufficiently aroused and decide for yourself what feels good.

The hymen is elastic and can stretch in different ways or, in rare cases, tear slightly. In addition to the first sexual intercourse, the following activities can also affect the hymen:

• Sporting activities such as dancing or yoga can loosen or stretch the tissue of the hymen.

• Inserting tampons or menstrual cups, which works for many people without any problems, while others experience a slight stretching sensation.

• Masturbation with fingers or toys, especially if the tissue is still very tight.

• Gynecological examinations, which can affect the hymen in rare cases.

This means that the hymen is not necessarily linked to sex - it is a flexible tissue that changes over the course of a woman's life.

Some people experience difficulty inserting tampons and wonder if their hymen is "too tight". In most cases, however, this is not the cause. It is much more likely:

• Tense pelvic floor muscles: if you're nervous or anxious, the muscles can unconsciously tense up.

• Unaccustomed use: It can help to use smaller tampons and adopt a relaxed position, especially when trying for the first time. Many teens also simply prefer to use products that do not need to be inserted into the vagina. Find out here what sustainable alternatives are available that do not need to be inserted into the vagina.

• Low moisture: Inserting a tampon can be uncomfortable, especially on light days. This is where period panties from our Daily collection can help. These panties are not only a game changer for discharge, but also for light bleeding - for example at the beginning or end of menstruation. Take a look at our Daily collection here.

• Rare anatomical features: In very rare cases, an unusual shape of the hymen can make insertion difficult - in such cases, a medical examination can help.

Important: Pain is not a normal condition! If you have regular problems, it may be worth consulting a doctor.

People with endometriosis pain when inserting tampons and the like. Not only period panties, but also washable pads can help. We therefore recommend our washable cloth pads to check them out.

During childbirth, the tissue of the vagina stretches enormously - this also affects the hymen. After a vaginal birth, often only small remnants of tissue (so-called carunculae hymenales ) remain. These have no function and are a completely natural change in the body after childbirth.

In the case of a caesarean section, the hymen usually remains unchanged as it is not involved in the birth. However, it may have already changed as a result of previous sexual experiences, examinations or other influences. The hymen is therefore not an "intact barrier", but a flexible tissue that changes naturally in the course of life.

Short answer: No! The belief that blood "has" to flow during the first time you have sex is a dangerous myth. Around half of all people with a vagina do not bleed the first time. If they do, this is usually due to dry tissue or too rapid penetration, not the hymen. A relaxed atmosphere can help to avoid pain.

If you experience severe pain, it may be a good idea to speak to a doctor. Sometimes there are medical reasons that can make sex uncomfortable, such as vaginismus (an involuntary tightening of the pelvic floor muscles).

If the first time is uncomfortable or doesn't work, there may be several reasons:

• Unaccustomed tension: if you are nervous, your muscles may tense up.

• Dryness: Lubricant can help to make penetration more comfortable.

• False expectations: If you are afraid that it will hurt, your body may automatically tense up.

• Rare anatomical conditions: In rare cases, a very tight or unusually shaped hymen can make access difficult. A medical examination can help here.

Important: No one should put themselves under pressure or put up with pain. Remember that pain during sex is not normal.

If you are experiencing severe pain, it may be a good idea to speak to a doctor. Sometimes there are medical reasons that can make sex uncomfortable, such as vaginismus (an involuntary tightening of the pelvic floor muscles).

This is completely normal! Some people are born with a barely pronounced or very flexible hymen that has no effect on sex at all. The concept of "virginity" should not be tied to a fold of tissue anyway - it is a social construct. Virginity is a personal definition and not a biological characteristic.

No, once stretched or slightly torn, the hymen does not regenerate to its original state. It changes over the years - through sport, tampon use or other movements - but it does not "grow back".

At Taynie, we think it's important to talk about sexual myths and to correct misinformation. The hymen is not a "virginity barrier", but a stretchable tissue that behaves differently for each person. Whether the hymen bleeds or not says nothing about you or your experiences.

We therefore recommend that you let go of societal expectations and listen to your own body - without fear, shame or pressure.

Author: Taynie.de